I haven't met you yet, but I Love you. On this Earth, I will love you with every molecule, cell, atom and soul of my existence. There is no other way.
My sweet child, I will read books to you every day and sing you lullabies. All kinds of books like children's books, non-fiction, adult fiction, metaphysics, Harry Potter. I will dress you in yellow, for sunshine and happiness (and gender neutrality!). I will take you out into the fresh air while I push your sports stroller on my run.
When I was a child, I wanted to make a list of things I shouldn't do as a parent. I never formally made that list, but informally, it has been on my mind since. I will try my best not to judge you or compare you to other people. I will not yell at you. I will try my best to lead by example and offer my guidance along the way.
Take heed, I will let you walk, and I will let you fall. I will let you stumble, then try again. Dear Child, I am terrified of having you and raising you. But if there's one thing I've learned, it is to do things that scare you. Fear is good motivation, but so is love. Together, it is unstoppable. Remember this.
You can be a winner if you try. Life isn't about being #1. The important thing is that you participate and try. Anything is possible if you set your eyes on it. You will be a winner in my eyes no matter if you are the first in line or the last. Don't do it for me. Do it for yourself and life will reward you.
Have faith. Everything will work itself out, even if something doesn't go as planned. Belief and hope are important in your journey. Without it, life feels empty. Don't be afraid to take leaps of faith in love. If you fear, stare at it with open eyes, and do it anyway.
Question. Curiosity keeps your mind young and your brain sharp. I encourage curiosity in childhood and adulthood. A lifetime of learning is advantageous. Question religion. Question ideas. Question science. A little skepticism is good for you. Too much may make you cynical and jaded. Be careful with this.
Practice tolerance. Realize you are no better or worse than the next person. People will have different viewpoints than you but that makes life colorful. Learn from different viewpoints, but don't hate. Hate is fear in disguise. Hate is a learned trait that is taught. I will not teach this. The last thing I would want is to project my fears and insecurities on to you.
Follow your dreams. Both waking and asleep. Trust your intuition. The answers you seek are all within you, if you know how to look. Look closer.
Enjoy the silence. Enjoy the spaces in between. This is how you learn to truly see.
Remember that no one is perfect. No matter what happens in your life, I will always love you.
Hope to see you in my lifetime,
Mama
[inspired by Seher's post: Baby, You Hear Me?]
If you could write a letter to your future child, what would it say? What advice or words of wisdom would you pass on?
Respond in comments, write your own post, or both.
Posts
44 wandering stars:
Wonderfully written. It sounded to me like Desiderata . I love this line most especially:
All kinds of books like children's books, non-fiction, adult fiction, metaphysics, Harry Potter.
By the time we have kids, Harry Potter will be like Oliver Twist.
Aaawww... Future Mummy Floreta, you just gave me the topic for my next post. Thanks. =))
aww you are such a cutie :D and getting inspired by me :D lol thanks babes!
just hope our children help us make our plans for em successful!
These beautiful sentiments, these dreams of what will be, brought tears to my eyes. It's been two decades since my Gurrrls were babies, but I remember vividly having those same hopes and dreams, and can tell you now with tremendous pride that we're on our way toward achieving them.
Thanks for your eloquence and grace.
I love this Floreta. Honestly, this is far different from your previous posts I've read. It talks about hope, optimism and love. May you be the best mother you can be in the future! :)
floreta, that was a beautifully written letter. one day you should read it out or print it out to your children :D now you make me wanna have babies even more.
must.look.for.a.suitable.man.to.father.my.child. LOL
that was beautiful...definitely need to give to any future children you have :)
Innovative....wonder if anybody has ever ventured to write something like this ever before.Lay your concerns to rest....u r gonna be one great mother.The words say so.Lovely bit of writing in the end where you involve the other bloggers as well seeking a reply.This enhances interaction.But I don't know I can reply.....it's still a long way...right now I wonder how I'll ever get the girl of my dreams and so kids are a looong way off.I'll read all your posts slowly....but how r u?Anxious to hear from u floreta!!
Cute! I think a letter to my firstborn would make for quite a scary, but funny read.
I'd been on writing a letter to my future/past/alternate self, but this would probably be better!
Yellow is gender neutral for who, exactly? It's not like a baby knows the difference between pink and blue until they're a little older!
Well put! Very insightful. I like the part about letting them stumble and fall. You're right, you need to let kids learn some things for themselves.
beautiful and touching.
You'll definitely be a loving and awesome mom.
You've pretty much nailed it but it's a lot to live up to! ;-) Having raised two daughters who are now 20 and 21, I know I was not a perfect mother. There is no such thing...though making some conscious decisions is always a good idea.
Basically, I've found that unconditional love is the best gift you can give your children; and protection. I raised mine by "I will still love you even if you're being a jerk right at this minute!" and "to the best of my ability, I will keep you safe".
p.s. my girls wore all colors of everything when they were babies. i enjoyed confusing others. ;-)
Wow! This is beautiful! Little floreta would be soooo blessed to have a mom like you =)
my son has turned out to be a math and science kid, yet we have very similar personalities in some ways. i read to him lots, we watch movies and cartoons together, we play lego, we go to the park...tonnes of fun.
how many kids do you think you'll have? if i have more, i'll adopt.
Oh darlin...
This was BEAUTIFUL. I am tearing up, you asshat.
Thanks for this. I think I may be inspired...
OOH I love this so much. SO MUCH. It's beautiful!! I feel honored to have been able to read this. :) You are a brilliant writer.
This was a beautiful letter. I especially like this part: "Fear is good motivation, but so is love. Together, it is unstoppable. Remember this." I just finished posting a letter to my younger self for apricot-tea's giveaway, I don't think I'm ready to write one to my future child...not too sure if motherhood is in the plan for me...itll freak me out to think too much about it lol. Anywho, I really enjoyed reading this;)
"Learn from different viewpoints, but don't hate."
All people should know this, you're really wise, Floreta. Any kid will be lucky to have you as his or her mother :)
i think you're going to be an awesome mother someday!!
"A lifetime of learning is advantageous. Question religion. Question ideas. Question science."
Yes!!! I absolutely agree! never let your mind go to mush, always keep the learning curve going! learning is so important in life!!
Demigoddess - just checked out the Desiderata.. hadn't read it before. you're right!
Nashe - you're welcome, go right ahead!
AD - yes you inspire me! and i do believe children will help push us to be better!
Cunning Rant - congratulations on seeing your vision into a reality. wow, this must be the third entry of mine that someone has mentioned being teary!! am i that good? :)
Kikit - did you read my recent Dear Mama post? it is similar!
Girl in Stiletto - hahaha ya i'm jumping the gun on this one too cos i'm single. :P oh well i have no clue if i'll ever have kids.. just thought i'd write one anyway.
Jessie - it would be neat to give.. i honestly feel i could go either way though on having kids, or not. i don't feel strongly either way! :P
Deeptesh - oh it's a long way for me too! i haven't even found "the one" yet ;P haha. if there is such things. one post you may be real interested in since you loved my vlog is my guest entry "Ode to Seb" on Sebastian's blog.
Seb - ha, good point. i guess "gender neutral" is for adults. kids just learn what it means eventually..
Children of the 90s - definitely. i don't want to be an overbearing mom.
LazyKing - thank you :) i am terrified. but i'm sure if it ever happens i'll step up to the plate.
Pagan Sphinx - great advice! i would dress my baby in all colors too :) the rainbow.. you're right.. i think my letter seems too perfect sounding. that's why in the end i say no one is perfect but i didn't realize that tone should also consider myself and not just the child.
Ella - thank you :) i really hope so.. denno why, i still worry i'd be horrible. i know i know, it's thoughts like that that show that i'll be good, yadayada but still. :P
vesper - from what i know of you, you seem like an awesome mom!! i'm really only thinking i'd have one kid.. and if i had two, i would adopt the 2nd.. so great minds think alike :)
LiLu - hahahaha asshat! sorry, i'll try not to write hallmark card entries much more ;P
Marissa - wow, thank you!! that means a lot coming from you :)
Retromus - i'm not sure if it's for me either! lol.. but i guess you could say it HAS been on my mind more lately and tugged at me.. damn and i thought i didn't have it in me? :(
Andhari - aww thanks! i am not sure if i consider myself wise but i'll take it!!
Larissa - absolutely. learning is good for personal growth.
Awww hey...very beautifully written. You'd make a wise loving mommy some day. =)
This has really inspired me. I've started writing a series of post to your children-to-be...
So important especially how much we have learnt from our parents good and bad...
A case of standing on the shoulders of giants according to Newton!
I hadn't a doubt before, but this just made me that much more sure...you'd make a great mom. :)
No rush though!
This was oh so lovely and wise. Especially, "If you fear, stare at it with open eyes, and do it anyway."
I once told my mother that I'd write a letter to my child(ren) each year of their lives, a chronicle of how they changed, grew, explored, lived. This post reminded me of that long-ago conversation. Thank you. A sweet, sweet memory---a very sweet post, too.
I wrote a book, "Oh, the Things You Will Know" to my, as yet, unborn children. It's all about what life in my early twenties was like, because children don't actually believe that their parents had an early twenties. It's funny, heartbreaking and probably too fucked up to actually give to my children. Even when they're in their mid-twenties.
You made my uterus ache... then I realize the reality of children would make me nuts because I'm not as patient asyou are... grr.
I am so glad to have read this! it is filled with love and hope and beauty. Your advice to question and pursue a healthy skepticism is brilliant. This is a very special post! -Meg
I love this! Totally inspired to write.
You mushed up a hardened Muppet's heart.
I, too am scared shizless of having a baby but know that I want to - I worry about what very specific way Bub and I could screw up a person. :/
But just like you said - the scariest things are the things worth doing..
Aw, that was so beautiful. And from the sound of it, you are gonig to make an AMAZING mother some day.
I don't even know what I'd say to a future child. Sadly, the thought of having one at this point still terrifies me! Hopefully the words will come when I need them though.
I love this post...so deep and full of life and wisdom. You will be prepared when you have your little one. And the baby in your photo is such a sweetie.
Beautiful post!!!
I've been aching to have a child but I have no clue on what will I have to say... you just inspire me to write one!
Thank you for sharing this with us!
mel - thank you :)
lion-ess - ooh can't wait to read what you have to say!
omegaradium - thanks! definitely no rush! and i really hope so.. it's one thing to write something and completely another to actually do it..
hannah - that sounds like a sweet idea! you think you will ever do it if you have kids?
mr apron - aw you wouldn't share it? and yes, so true. it's hard to imagine our parents in their 20s!
tough girl - hahaha! who knows they might actually drive me nuts too :P
blisshappens - thank you! i'm glad you read it also. and yes, i think healthy skepticism is important!
muppet - aw, i can't picture your heart hardened! i am still scared shitless about kids.. =/
that was really sweet! I also love the dressing the bebe in yellow...or green. pink and blue is totally overrated.
Aww, that's such a sweet letter. Love it. I'm here from the 20something comment group! Great blog!
http://fab.typepad.com/brunette
amindinmotown - thanks for your comment! and like i said, i am still definitely TERRIFIED! it's much easier to write than actually do it.. i'm still single. one step at a time. haha
write girl - thanks for noticing the baby! it took me awhile to search for the perfect picture :)
mrs. zeus - you should write one!! you seem more ready than me :)
hannah-lane - i agree pink and blue are overrated
margarita - i'm glad you like my blog and thanks for the follow!
i did write a letter to my girls when they were inside of me....you've just given me a blog post idea. thanks.
this is so beautifully written.
Wow. I honestly don't think I could sit down and write that letter to my future child, but I share so many of the same feelings as you about it. I do think about it, but I've never really formulated those feelings properly. Maybe I will one day.
your kid is going to be awesome.
raino - thanks! love that i've given you a blog post idea. take it!
penny - it's a good exercise :)
bryan - aw, thank you :)
I have a hunch.U r gonna be the best mother!!
I loved this. When I get a little closer to having my own baby, I'll probably write my own little note not just for the baby but for myself.
Shawna's Study Abroad
This is beautiful.. I wish I had the courage to try this exercise but I'd probably end up writing something like "Please be good so I don't get the urge to throttle you. K thanks bye".
Yeah. I will be a ROCKING mother.
That was fantastic.
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